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Thursday, August 9: Femme Fatale

BAD GOOD GUYS

by Deborah Elliott-Upton

Last week I wrote about the good bad guys, but sometimes it’s the bad good guys that court the Muse.

Tucking my children into bed, they always begged, “Tell me a story.” The mother in me knew it was a ploy to extend their bedtime. The writer in me would allow myself to be persuaded, just this once.

The stories were basically short story versions of whatever happened that day, ending with a twist they wouldn’t expect. I probably envisioned myself creating something like “The Never Ending Story,” but surely none of my bedtime tales would hold up in today’s publishing reality.

The adventures of a prince and princess named after my own children took star billing and the enemies were thinly-veiled composites of whoever seemed most non-redeeming in my life at the time. A neighbor who didn’t like children in her yard became the witch who caught children in traps. Of course, she had lured them by the fat cherries growing on her trees guarding our common fence and hanging almost within reach. When inevitable trespassing occurred, she resorted to threats against the king. Did my stories have morals? Maybe, but as often as not, I enjoyed letting the cherry thieves return home victorious like “Jack and The Beanstalk” red-handed with the golden goose. My “heroes” escaped most consequences without anything worse than a scolding by their mother. Instead, they had adventures. Who knows, I may have scarred them for life and will find myself the subject in their therapies someday down the road, but so far, so good.

The kids loved the stories almost as much as I enjoyed telling them — and I learned a few things about storytelling along the way.

1) A child won’t listen to a boring storyline (early editor training)
2) Action is more important than fashion reports (all genders agree)
3) The hero doesn’t have to be of the shining armor variety (surprise, surprise!)

In fact, the hero doesn’t even have to be heroic as long as the adventure is exciting.

In a short story I submitted to a soon-to-be published anthology (more about that in a later column), one of my writer friends critiquing the story said, “I don’t much like your protagonist and you let him get away with wrongdoing.” The editor agreed adding, “The anti-hero’s actions and alibi don’t hold up under scrutiny. Good policework would easily prove him guilty.” Good points indeed.

I rewrote the story and although accepted for the anthology, my protagonist is still not a guy you’d want your daughter to bring home for dinner. He is an unlikely … for want of a better word … hero.

Most editors and readers want someone to pay for bad behavior. I do write those and feel good with the Knights of the Roundtable proclamation of “Might does not make right” endings, but sometimes, I resort to tales told in the safety of the dark without cheerful endings. Writing those make me feel good, too. Perhaps my Muse is stranger than most. Not every story must end with happily ever after, referred to as The Hollywood Ending. At least that’s my mindset.

Growing up, I remember reading short stories where the hero wasn’t really all that good a guy, although he could be if he had to … he just didn’t stay good for long.

I’ve mentioned my fondness for the bad guy. For me, Moriarty is rated right up there with Sherlock Holmes. (Give me an intellectual guy over a pretty boy any time.) J. R. Ewing was written as a guy we love to hate and as portrayed by Larry Hagman, a character the world soon adored. We enjoyed his wins over the whining Cliff Barnes or goody-goody brother, Bobby. It’s not easy to outsmart those good ol’ boys time after time and still have women flocking after him like fish to stinkbait. J. R. would be a great contestant on “Survivor” … we’d all tune in for that. I imagine J. R. getting others to do his work while he played with their minds. Richard Hatch, you are no match for J. R.

Very few women are not in love with the scandalous Captain Jack Sparrow of “Pirates of the Caribbean” fame. Deftly acted by the handsome Johnny Depp, Captain Jack is certainly not a good guy in the vein of John Wayne, but he overshadows the equally beautiful Orlando Bloom as goody-goody Will Turner. For me, the eternally cool Steve McQueen is Hollywood’s ultimate bad good guy.

Bad boys deserve a bad rap sometimes, but they make the story more exciting. At least it does for those of us who like a bad good guy occasionally.

Posted in Femme Fatale on August 9th, 2007
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15 comments

  1. August 9th, 2007 at 9:30 am, Leigh Says:

    I was thinking of another pirate as I was reading the article.

    When I was a kid, I loved Peter Pan, but never got to see the movies. Several years ago, I was a Disney guest to view a re-release of Peter Pan, the animated version. I was impressed by what a clever bad guy Captain Hook was.

    The little kid in me liked Peter Pan, but the adult part appreciated Hook’s dimensionality.

  2. August 9th, 2007 at 12:49 pm, Tom Walsh Says:

    There are many contexts in which it truly can be said that “good guys finish last.” One such context, in my admittedly limited experience, is the heart’s lonely hunt. Should you have the misfortune of being a “good guy,” you’d better cultivate a bit of the “bad boy” image if you ever hope to interest members of the opposite sex. “Good guys” are just plain boring. Most young ladies want a young Elvis or Fonz to domesticate. If your mother beat them to the punch, you don’t represent: (1) danger or (2) a reformation challenge. Too bad for you! So, “good guys,”(even if you know better) load up your fork with mashed potatoes before going after the peas.

  3. August 9th, 2007 at 2:26 pm, Prissy Vanover Says:

    Debbie –

    You say it like you see it – and you’re right on! In the “real” world, heroes are just humans like the rest of us – sometimes good, sometimes bad – and usually trying our best at any given moment. I think we all have it in us to be a hero – to someone at some point in time.

    I love the pictures your words paint. I can see your little heroes reaching up to grab the fruit off that overhanging tree limb – hear the neighbor yelling – and see you grinning at their loot and daring that neighbor to take a step in your direction! You enjoyed raising little ones and sharing the stories in your heart. I’m glad you share with all of us, too.

    Prissy

  4. August 9th, 2007 at 2:53 pm, alisa Says:

    I love it that finally the “hero” can be human. If there were wonder guys out there like a lot of heroes are written to be, the world would be so dull! A little bad boy never hurt any guy, real or written. I know this is hard to believe, but I never watched Dallas. I still think of Vic on The Shield. I even wonder at myself trying so hard to see the good in a copy gone very very bad!

    I love your bedtime stories you told your children. How fun for them! (not to mention mom)

    Jack Sparrow is bad? You just ruined my day. :-)

  5. August 9th, 2007 at 3:22 pm, Travis Erwin Says:

    What about bad girls? The world wouldn’t be nearly as exciting without them.

    You know the kind I mean. The type who can get us innocent guys to do things we never would have otherwise.

    The kind that winks and smiles at you while they are leading you away from the straight and narrow.

    The kind with nicknames like Femme Fatale. 😉

  6. August 9th, 2007 at 4:05 pm, Dale C. Andrews Says:

    Moriarty’s strength as a character is underscored by the fact that he actually shows up in only two Arthur Conan Doyle Holmes stories, although I think he is referenced in several others. In The Valley of Fear Holmes observes to Watson that Moriarty’s evil floats just below the surface in many crimes. A truly great villain.

  7. August 9th, 2007 at 6:15 pm, scott Says:

    Bad and good is in the mind of the beholder. I’ve always said Depp is a bad boy and my harem friends all say “No, he’s a good boy.” But Deborah has certainly here described her subject well. I can see some light on the subject unbefore seen.

    So, keep telling those stories to the new generation of grandchildren and keep us posted with your great insight into life.

    scott

  8. August 9th, 2007 at 6:20 pm, Deborah Says:

    Tom, I know most of us end up with the nice guy over the bad boy, so there’s hope yet.
    Alisa, Captain Jack is not bad…me thinks he might be quite good.
    Travis, You have never been innocent.
    Dale, Yes, Moriarty’s a truly great villain. Have y’all seen the movie, “Young Sherlock Holmes”? In it, Moriarty is all I imagined. (Note: watch through the end of the credits!)

  9. August 9th, 2007 at 7:20 pm, Deborah Says:

    Deborah,

    Most people fall for the dangerous but sexy bad guy before they want the boring good guy. Keep up with glorifying the “bad” in all of us.

    Mark D

  10. August 9th, 2007 at 8:27 pm, Leigh Says:

    Tom: “heart’s lonely hunt”… Wow, you’re waxing poetic!

    alis: I never saw Dallas either. I had friends from Europe visiting and we had gone out to dinner. Suddenly, they started rushing through their meal (very un-European-line behavior) and virtually zoomed back to my house… to turn on Dallas.

    Travis: That cracked me up, “The kind with nicknames like Femme Fatale”.

    Young Sherlock Homes is a good example (and one of those rare stories that honors rather than violates the canon).

    I hate to fall back upon the ‘comix’ world again, but Lex Luthor in the early episodes of Smallville (when it was worth watching), was an astonishing complex and conflicted character, with light and darkness warring inside him. (I prefer that phrase to ‘good and evil’ in this case.) Absentee mother, sociopathic father, and buckets of money created a potent brew.

    The Bond movies were often defined by how good (bad) the evildoers were. No matter how good the plot, a wimpy baddie could spoil the scene.

    Last weekend,I saw Live Free or Die Hard, and I was impressed by the storytelling, despite unrealistic stunts. I noted the movie didn’t make too many mistakes vis-à-vis the computer lore and they kept the pace pushing forward. But the best part was they featured 3 bad guys, each nastier than the next. One guy seemed to have superpowers, the Asian chick was not a girl you’d take home to mother, and her lover was a quietly mad genius. Mmm, goodie!

  11. August 10th, 2007 at 3:05 am, rob lopresti Says:

    See, Leigh, I thought the only weak part of Live Free was the main villain. The actor was thin dishwater to me. (Ah, Alan Rickman in the original! Now, THERE was a bad guy.)

    When I was a kid I loved the Tintin books, early graphic novels by a Belgian by Herge. Then I read a piece commenting that Tintin had no personality. And it’s true. All he had was a string of virtues, like the Boy Scout Oath: trustworthy, loyal, friendly. etc.

    You need something negative to give the character character.

    I remember when I read the first Harry Potter book I was impressed that the hero was somewhat short-tempered, impulsive, defensive, and snotty. Yeah, I said, she gets it.

  12. August 10th, 2007 at 8:26 am, Leigh Says:

    I agree, the main bad guy was the weakest of the three.

    I also agree that Tintin was visually great, but the stories didn’t do much for me.

    The Potter character in the 3 stories I’ve read so far that is the most intriguing to me is Professor Snapes, kind of an ethical mess.

  13. August 10th, 2007 at 4:28 pm, JLW Says:

    Yeah, but Hermione is hot. I love a girl with brains.

  14. August 10th, 2007 at 10:19 pm, Stephen Ross Says:

    I see Alan Rickman’s name mentioned above (the villain in Die Hard … “and by the time they work out what went wrong, we’ll be sitting on a beach, earning twenty percent.“); and now I see Professor Snape get a mention – Alan Rickman plays this character in the HP movies. It reminds me: AR was also a great “bad guy” in Robin Hood … “Cancel Christmas!“, and not to forget, he originated the role of Valmont (on the stage) in Christopher Hampton’s Les Liaisons Dangereuses. He’s a dependable villain.

    I could date Hermione, but I’d be thinking of Moaning Myrtle.

  15. August 11th, 2007 at 12:15 pm, Lissa Says:

    Another really great bad guy is John Lithgow. he can be funny and charming, but when he plays bad he is at his best. Thanks, Deborah, for reminding us all of the ‘good’ bad guys and how much fun they can be!! :]]

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