SPEAK LOUDER, PLEASE

by Angela Zeman

Last week I went to (no, not Manderly again) a neighborhood party. A fun party. I have fun neighbors. Not unexpectedly, because I live about twenty seconds south of Wall Street, I met some men and women who work in the Financial Sector. Now these lovely people were not 24 year old junior brokers. No, they were older ‘management’ types from some fine institutions. After some chatter that included exalted names, large numbers, and planned IPOs, my turn came to introduce myself. I said, “I’m a mystery writer.”

I am. What else could I say? Conversation stopped. Who among you can guess their next question?

“Where do you get your ideas?”

You’d think all those Masters Degrees could ask something more original, but…they waited breathlessly for my answer, and I’m not that fascinating.

I possess a perverse nature, my friends. I considered saying: “I get my best ideas from listening to conversations like yours!” True. But I played ditzy blonde. I said vaguely, “Everywhere. I find ideas everywhere.” Still true, but somehow reassuring to them. (I only lie for money.) Their relief was visible, and, in my opinion, amazingly gullible. Think how many stories are written in a year. Include in that tally stories of all lengths, in all forms. In such a saturated field, how do writers produce fresh ideas? We dig, we read, we listen, we notice lots and lots of details. I mean, duh!

Some writing gurus say only a finite number of plots exist. I can’t dispute that because I’ve never done the homework. Regardless, reading is one my greatest pleasures. If stories were mostly repeats of each other, I wouldn’t read them—who would? Obviously some serious creativity is happening in the writing world.

So, public service warning: overheard conversations are considered ‘source material’ to a writer, as are current events, people watching, newspapers, family gossip, and even blogs. New ideas are gold.

UNFORTUNATELY, the public can rest all too easy in the presence of mystery writers. Ideas are the merest tip of the iceberg. Into those icy waters swim writers who must craft those ideas into fresh and entertaining stories or—to push the metaphor a bit—sink. Let’s say a wife murders her husband. Years ago EQMM, I think it was, announced that spouse murder submissions would earn automatic rejection. Well, okay, kill someone else. Drug deals? No, too many already. Serial murders are over. In this era of ‘realism’ nearly all legal thrillers, police procedurals, and spy gigs are written by lawyers, cops, and ex-spies. That excludes many writers rather neatly.

How many ways can one pull off a burglary? Donald Westlake, Ed Hoch, or Lawrence Block could best answer that question. Heavy competition. What about a cat that can press a furry paw on the murderer in a photo? I’ll skip that one. What about a ‘locked room’ mystery? Fascinating—but without an orangutan or a trained spotted snake—I’ll work on it. A hit man as protagonist. Wait, a hit woman? How about a female bounty hunter who’s young and funny. Mmmm, comedy’s a special skill. Besides, J E already dominates that franchise. Okay—let’s get a jewel thief to repent and help the cops…oh, been done a few times. You know, this is not so easy.

Sympathetic and ingenious readers, please send your ideas to me, in care of this web blog.