THIS FAR, NO FARTHER

by Rob Lopresti

Recently I was reading a mystery story and enjoying it. Then I was enjoying it less. And finally I asked myself: “Why am I still reading this?”

So I stopped. I find myself reaching that point more quickly these days, especially for novels. There are too many interesting books out there to throw good time after bad.

I had an English professor in college who advised us to finish every book we started until we reached the age of forty. (Or maybe it was thirty—in any case it was some impossibly distant age that I never expected to reach.) Until then, he said, we don’t have the judgment to decide whether the book was worth finishing. We owe it to the author to hear her out.

But now, being (ahem) past forty, I don’t hesitate to tell an author, “You and I have to start seeing other people. Right now.”

Hasty judgments

I have occasionally been a contest judge for stories and novels. That meant reading everything that appeared in a category in a given year. I would always start by reading each one from end to end but as the books piled up my perspective would change. At some point in a story I would say to myself “Edgar Allan Poe and O. Henry double-teaming couldn’t come up with an ending that would shoehorn this piece of schlock into my top ten for the year.” Then I’d move onto the next candidate.

It’s the old editor’s line: “You don’t need to eat the whole egg to know it’s spoiled.” On the other hand I do know an editor who claims to read every submission to the end, feeling it is owed to the author. To my mind that is carrying professionalism above and beyond the point of duty.

Boob tube

Same thing holds true with TV. Last fall I had half a dozen new series marked as possibly worth watching. In every single case I eventually got to the point of asking “Why am I watching this?” and reaching for the remote. In some cases it took several episodes. In a few I said my farewells before the first commercial break. I always fall out of love with some of the hopefuls but this is the first season in which I rejected everything the networks threw at me. The writer’s strike couldn’t have come fast enough, as far as I was concerned.

Of course, blog entries are different. You should always read them down to the very end. If you don’t the electrons will become unbalanced and eventually cause your computer to slow down and become erratic. If you are experiencing such problems, perhaps you should go back and read a few of my blog entries all the way to the end, just in case. I suggest this strictly for your own good, of course. Don’t bother to thank me.