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Thursday, June 11: The Scribbler (Special Edition)

Deborah Elliott-Upton should return next week. Yay!

—JLW

OUR FIENDISH PLAN

by James Lincoln Warren

ccwc-logo1

This weekend, Sisters in Crime Los Angeles Chapter and the Southern California Chapter of Mystery Writers of America are convening the California Crime Writers Conference at the Hilton Pasadena here in Southern Cal. The conference is offering multiple classes and discussions on both Saturday and Sunday and looks like it’s going to be a great time — Robert Crais and Laurie King are our special guests of honor. There is still time to sign up if you’re interested, and registrations will also be accepted at the door.

CB alumna Melodie Johnson Howe and I were asked to run the short story workshop, which will take place this Sunday at 10:30 a.m. The Gentle Reader may be curious as to how we intend to present it, so here’s the exchange of emails in which Melodie and I discuss our plans.

9 June 2009 10:10 am
From: James Lincoln Warren
To: Melodie Johnson Howe
Subject: California Crime Writers Conference

Macushla—

What are your thoughts for our joint presentation? What material do you want to cover? And how would you like to do our tag team in terms of instruction?

We have 75 minutes. That makes 37 minutes 30 seconds for each of us if we divide the time equally between us.

I’m looking at making my presentation as technical as possible — plot diagrams, economy in prose and exposition, acceptable length, how to count words, and so forth, rather than try to stimulate creativity with writing exercises. I like to “chalk talk” when I teach, but since I do not anticipate having a blackboard, I’ll be bringing an easel and a large artist’s pad to write on with a Sharpie as I disseminate my divine wisdom to the ignorant masses.

I have no idea what your approach is, but I’m thinking that you are probably a better choice for discussing evocative writing, characterization, description, and so on. Either way, I consider you the senior partner in this enterprise and will conform your plans.

How’s by you and Bones? Give the dogs hugs from Unca Jim.

JLW sends.

9 June 2009 11:11 am
From: Melodie Johnson Howe
To: James Lincoln Warren
Subject: Re: California Crime Writers Conference

James,

Yes, I would be better at discussing “evocative writing” and how to distill it for the short story form. I think we’ll make a good team in covering all they need to know about writing and selling short stories.

Age before beauty, but since I have both on you I’ll go last as a counter balance.

We need to allow time for q&a. Let’s save that for the end and we can spread our wisdom together.

Now how much time for q&a? Fifteen minutes? Twenty minutes? They do like to ask their questions.

Bones is doing great, thank God. And the dogs are barking.

M

9 June 2009 12:29 pm
From: James Lincoln Warren
To: Melodie Johnson Howe
Subject: Re[2]: California Crime Writers Conference

> Age before beauty, but since I have both on you I’ll go last as a
> counter balance.

Cruel wench!

I think that’s a good plan. I provide the framework and you give them the opportunity to fill it out.

> We need to allow time for q&a. Let’s save that for the end and we
> can spread our wisdom together.

> Now how much time for q&a? Fifteen minutes? Twenty minutes?
> They do like to ask their questions.

How about 25 minutes for the first presentation, followed by ten minutes for questions, then another 25 minute presentation with 15 minutes for questions at the end? That gives the audience a natural mental break between subjects, and secondly, if we save all the questions for the end they’re more likely to cover your presentation than mine, since it will be fresher in their minds. With two Q&As, both topics will more or less get equal time. But this isn’t critical. If you’d rather do a single Q&A, I can certainly live with it.

JLW sends.

9 June 2009 12:46 pm
From: Melodie Johnson Howe
To: James Lincoln Warren
Subject: Re: Re[2]: California Crime Writers Conference

The q&a following your presentation and then following mine is fine with me.

M

So there you have it. Hope to see you there.

Posted in The Scribbler on June 11th, 2009
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16 comments

  1. June 11th, 2009 at 1:57 pm, Rob Says:

    I prefer cunning plans to fiendish ones. Especially plans more cunning than a fox that had just been named professor of cunning at Oxford University. (Some of our readers will know what I’m talking about).

    Good to hear (read) Melodie’s voice again. Have a great time, guys. I’m sure the audience will.

  2. June 11th, 2009 at 3:24 pm, John Floyd Says:

    You two should have a great time with this — Wish I could be there to hear you.

    Knock ’em dead.

  3. June 11th, 2009 at 5:56 pm, Velma Says:

    Rob, I need an explanation! That went over my blonde little head.

  4. June 11th, 2009 at 7:06 pm, Kevin Tipple Says:

    I’m not getting it either. But, have fun at the conference!

  5. June 11th, 2009 at 8:08 pm, Hamilton Says:

    Darn it! I so wanted to attend the conference, but now I’m stuck on a professional assignment to France… Any chance you guys could have the short story workshop made into a podcast? Or even a YouTube video?

    Have fun, all!

  6. June 11th, 2009 at 9:12 pm, JLW Says:

    I can make an audio recording of the session, but I’ll have to get permission from SoCalMWA and SinCLA to post it. The other problem is that I use diagrams for discussing plot structure, and obviously they won’t be visible on an audio file.

    But it’s certainly worth looking into.

    Poor puppy! Having to go to France. Trust me, it beats the pants off Pasadena — and I like Pasadena.

  7. June 11th, 2009 at 9:29 pm, Hamilton Says:

    Thanks for looking into it, James.

    As to France, well, it’s all right for a week or two, but three months? I live not far from you (Orange County) and really wouldn’t mind spending the summer at the beach in Newport Coast.

  8. June 11th, 2009 at 9:30 pm, Dick Stodghill Says:

    Any chance you might move it from Pasadena to Cleveland so I could attend? The Western Reserve is nice this time of year. Or any other time of the year.

  9. June 11th, 2009 at 10:52 pm, Kevin Tipple Says:

    Thank you as well, James. I hope it can be done and would be very interested if it could be accomplished.

  10. June 12th, 2009 at 12:12 am, Velma Says:

    I worry about the CCWC logo. According to my Rand McNally’s, it’s pointed approximately at Midway Islands and what does it say about Nevada? Get hammered in Vegas?

  11. June 12th, 2009 at 2:41 am, Jeff Baker Says:

    I agree, nice to have Melodie back! And I love the logo for the conference! It took me a moment to recognise where I’d seen the handle of the gun before. I guess I was “as thick as a whale omlette…”
    Best wishes for the conference!

  12. June 12th, 2009 at 3:30 am, Rob Says:

    Sorry to confuse people with my first comment. I see that Jeff Baker understood it. “Whale omelette” comes from the same source,namely a Brit Com called BLACKADDER. The show wandered through history but one constant was a very stupid man named Baldrick, who was always coming up with cunning plans.

    His boss, Blackadder, is the one with the gift of language who put in the line about the fox which I mention. He also tells Baldrick “You wouldn’t recognise a cunning plan even if it painted itself pink and danced on a grand piano singing “cunning plans are here again.”

    But my favorite line from the show is the ominous warning that . “death and disease stalk our land like two great stalking things.” How true.

  13. June 12th, 2009 at 6:52 pm, Dick Stodghill Says:

    Rob, I loved Blackadder. The final scene of the last episode was chilling, though.
    Have you seen Rowan Atkinson in “The Thin Blue Line”? Raunchy but hilarious. Why are the Brits so much better at this sort of thing?

  14. June 13th, 2009 at 12:17 am, Jeff Baker Says:

    I did not see that last scene coming (in “Blackadder Goes Forth”) I sat there with my jaw dropped. Regular readers of this blog might enjoy the earlier episode “Ink and Incapability” (in “Blackadder the Third”). It features Dr. Johnson and his famous Dictionary. Uh, oh! I have the theme music running through my head! Better call Dr. House!

  15. June 13th, 2009 at 12:28 am, Rob Says:

    Yes, the last scene of “Byeee!” the last episode of the WW1 series was a shock. Since then, however our heroes (?) have returned in Blackadder’s Christmas Carol and Blackadder Back And Forth. In the latter modern Blackadder meets Shakespeare and punches him the face. “That’s for hundreds of years of school children!”

  16. June 14th, 2009 at 10:13 pm, Stephen Ross Says:

    A little late to the discussion, but it might be of interest (“How Blackadder changed the history of TV comedy”).

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/entertainment/news/article.cfm?c_id=1501119&objectid=10578518&pnum=0

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