Wednesday, September 23: Tune It Or Die!
THE STORY GENE
by Rob Lopresti
I just got back from a week of visiting family on the east coast. I spent a few days with all three of my siblings for the first time in a decade – although we’ve all seen each other more often than that.
There were nine family members, plus a couple of other special guests who were there part of the time. Almost sixty years of age separated the oldest from the youngest. So, what did we do when we got together?
Well, we ate. Mmm, lasagna! But mostly we told stories.
First we talked about travel. Miserable plane trips. Who we saw before arriving. Where we toured the day before.
Next came news briefs: job changes, school stuff, future plans.
Then came health issues. Plenty there to discuss as most of us travel through (or past) middle age.
But finally we got to what you might call Deep Story: family memories, some of them dating back before my birth. Do you remember the time the tree fell on the house? When did we sell the house down the shore? Did you hear that Grandma worked for Thomas Edison?
Sometimes it turns out we heard the stories differently, or even remember the same events differently. But that just made the discussion more interesting. (The youngest of the clan politely ignored the chatter of her elders, while offering her own salute to story-telling: she was rereading Harry Potter.)
At one point I held the floor for several minutes (probably too long), telling everyone about one of my adventures. And as all eyes were turned in my direction I starting thinking about the narrative urge. The desire to tell and listen to stories, which keeps us writers of fiction in business, seems to be built into the family heritage. And I don’t mean just the Lopresti family.
A very old story
Once upon a time, a very long time ago, two sisters were born. Since language had recently been invented, the proud parents were able to name their children, and they called them Og and Zog. The girls resembled each other in looks and personalities, but there was one tiny difference between them.
Og was fascinated with stories. She liked to hear them and to tell them. Zog, on the other hand, didn’t care for them.
It turned out that Og’s children inherited her fondness for stories. And that’s where things get interesting.
When gatherers came back and reported where they had found the most honey, Og’s children paid close attention. When a hunter came back, frightened and bleeding, and explained why you should never, ever cross a meadow if animals are behaving in a certain way, the sons and daughters of Og took in every word. And when the wild-thinker in the tribe explained that these berries were sacred to the gods and must never be eaten, guess who took this rule to heart.
Which meant Og’s children were slightly more likely than Zog’s to find the honey, avoid the lion, and ignore the poisonous berries. Which gave them a tiny advantage in survival.
And so, while Og and Zog had the same number of children, Og had more grandchildren, and even more great-grandchildren. Give or take a few thousand generations and most of us have some of Og’s blood in our veins. That’s evolution, baby.
A love story
I feel like I need to pay this off with a family story, so here’s one I heard a decade ago, as I remember it.
My father told me that his father came to the United States from Sicily early in the twentieth century. John remembered a family from his village who had come to New Jersey earlier. Mostly he remembered a girl named Mamie.
He went to the Garden State and found the family, but alas, Mamie had made up her mind to become a nun. This, of course, was not what John had in mind.
Now it happened that Mamie’s father ran an ice cream parlor in Plainfield, New Jersey. He wasn’t very good at it. The ice cream was fine. The problem was when customers came in he had a habit of telling them “I’m busy. Go away.” Experts in retail tend to frown on this as a sales technique.
It occurred to him that if John married hid daughter they could take the shop off his hands. So, with a little paternal persuasion, Mamie agreed to give up her hopes for the nunnery and instead become a wife and eventually the mother of four children.
Her husband John turned the ice cream parlor into a grocery store, which is what you see in the picture above. (Alas, the people in sight are not my relatives.)
“So what happened to Great-grampa?” I asked my father. “Did he find a business where he didn’t have to deal with the public?”
“Not exactly,” said Dad. “He became a bootlegger.”
Final thought
Do you have relatives your own age or older? Have you asked what they remember about your family’s history? Is anyone writing these stories down?
Because if not, they will soon be as lost as the stories Og told her children.
Rob, I love the story, and I’m not sure I ever heard the part about the bootlegger, which only goes to prove your point that we heard stories differently. And further proving the point, I was told the guy in the picture is Grandpop (John in your story).
What I find fascinating in our family is all the creative genes running around. Three serious writers, theater folks, musicians and singers — but Mom and Dad were not very artsy at all. So where did the creative gene come from?
Good idea, Rob. I took your advice a decade before hearing it. Some health problems turned me off fiction for a while, yet I still felt like writing. Did a five-part family history, some of which was made easy by a long account written by my maternal great-grandfather and another by an aunt. Years later I ran two of the sections through a publishing mill. One has become popular and is in the library of the United States Military Academy at West Point. By coincidence, two days ago I dug out a portion of that old history and began expanding on the misadventures of my father. If nothing else, doing so is fun.
I like the sales technique of Mamie’s father. Brought memories of 7th grade in 1938 when four of us were allowed to take mornings off for a month to scrounge around for material to build Soap Box Derby racers and perhaps find sponsors willing to part with $10. None of us succeeded at that. Our standard approach was, “Ya don’t wanna sponsor no Soap Box Derby car, do ya?”
Great piece, Rob. Some family things you never hear about unless you probe. When I was in college I was very interested in sportscasting, though my efforts in that line (and I was good) never extended beyond my work on the campus radio station. Not until after he died did I learn that my father, as a divinity student at the University of Chicago in the 1930s, broadcast sermons on the radio. He told me knew Ralph Capone, Al’s brother whom he pronounced a “nice guy,” but why didn’t he tell me about his radio work?
Rob,
This is just wonderful.
As the oldest living person in my family on both my father’s side and my mother’s side, I see my responsibility is clear.
Thanks for the nudge.
Terrie
Rob, thanks! As the son of a geneologist, I’m well aware of the utter coolness of family history and stories! I could wear out the internet recounting the ones I know! I reccomend that readers of this blog use all available tech to record their elders telling “the old stories.”