MEME THIS

by Steve Steinbock

A meme, according to the American Heritage Dictionary, is

n. A unit of cultural information, such as a cultural practice or idea, that is transmitted verbally or by repeated action from one mind to another.

The term, coined by evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins, is an amalgamation of the word gene (i.e. an individual unit of genetic material) and the Greek word mimema (meaning “something imitated”).

I don’t like memes. I’m skeptical of the concept. It’s a pseudoscientific measure of something scientifically unverifiable or measurable. Even if they are real, I’m not sure they’re a good thing.

I’m not a fan of the man who invented memes. I’ve never read The Selfish Gene or The God Delusion, but every lecture or interview I’ve watched or heard of Dawkins has revealed him to be an angry, bombastic, supercilious prig with a chip on his shoulder the size of Uranus.

Although the term is pronounced meem, whenever I see it, I think, “Me! Me!”

On the Internet, the term meme has taken on a meaning that is clearly not what it was intended to be, namely, the gaggles of surveys and questionnaires that get passed from friend to friend like chain e-mails.

I don’t typically respond to these email pseudo-memes. But lately I’ve received some interesting ones that pertain to books and book-lovers. I’ve collected a few of these questionnaires, and despite myself, I’m going to tackle some here.

This first one – one of several different internet chain-questionnaires called “Bookish” – is long (twenty-six questions). So in the interest of space, I’ll only answer the first half this week.

Bookish

Rules: You have received this note because someone thinks you are a literary geek (not that that’s a bad thing!) Copy the questions into your own note, answer the questions, and tag any friends who would appreciate the quiz, including the person who sent you this.

(1) What author do you own the most books by?

Lawrence Block (136 volumes), followed by Ellery Queen (95 volumes). Lagging behind them are Ed McBain (57 volumes) and Fredric Brown (40 volumes). I’m a collector. What can I say?

(2) What book do you own the most copies of?

I used to have a lot of copies of Chandler’s The Big Sleep, but I’ve given them all away. Now it’s probably some title by Lawrence Block. If I had to guess, I’d say The Burglar Who Liked to Quote Kipling.

[The version of this questionnaire that I received was missing a Question #3]

(4) What fictional character are you secretly in love with?

I never kiss and tell.

(5) What book(s) have you read the most times in your life?

That would have to be either The Adventures of Tom Sawyer or Raymond Chandler’s Farewell My Lovely.

(6) What was your favorite book when you were ten years old?

You actually expect me to remember that far back? If I had to wager a guess, I’d say it was The Secret of Terror Castle by Robert Arthur. That was the first of the “Alfred Hitchcock and the Three Investigators” series.

(7) What is the worst book you’ve read in the past year?

If I read a bad book this past year, it’s already been banished from my memory.

(8) What is the best book you’ve read in the past year?

I thoroughly enjoyed Paper Towns by John Green. It won the Edgar for Best Young Adult Mystery last year, although I’m not sure I’d classify it as a mystery. I’m not sure it was the best book I read last year. It was an awfully good read, though.

(9) If you could force everyone you tagged to read one book, what would it be?

I hate this question. Forcing a book on someone else is almost guaranteed to ruin the book for that person. When I was in college, after the twelfth person told me Zen in the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance would change my life, I broke down and read it. The book didn’t impress me and didn’t change my life. Perhaps without the well-intentioned hype from all my friends, I would have appreciated it more. However, one book that I read a couple years ago that really blew my mind in a good way was Replay by Ken Grimwood.

(10) Who deserves to win the next Nobel Prize for literature?

Me.

(11) What book would you most like to see made into a movie?

A Princess of Mars by Edgar Rice Burroughs. This book has been optioned, planned, and scrapped more times than any other novel that I know of. If the adaptation were to keep true to Burrough’s story and vision, I’d love to see this film get made.

(12) What book would you least like to see made into a movie?

The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins.

(13) Describe your weirdest dream involving a writer, book, or literary character.

I can’t remember ever having a dream about a writer, book, or character. And if I did, I’m not sure I’d tell you about it. I tend to dream while I read, rather than read while I dream.

Unless something else comes up between now and then, I’ll be back for the second half next week. I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts on any of these questions or on internet questionnaires in general. But don’t meme me.